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Advice Submissions

Submission by Josh Mans

Question: I have never had a girlfriend before, and I really want one. All the girls around me seem to care about looks. What should I do?

Dear Josh,

First of all I highly doubt that you are unattractive, since I believe that all of God’s people are fearfully and wonderfully made. Some people choose not to take care of their appearance like they should. I believe that all people should attempt to look, and smell (lol) their best. Poor hygiene is a big turn off.

Too many young people are insecure and are looking for ways to reach places of status. So it may be true that many of the girls you know are seeking relationships with guys that bring up their status. (Guys do this as well). They also select friendships based on status also. In my opinion these are not “real” relationships anyway, but a form of usery. This is definitely not a Christian response to relationships.

If there are a lot of girls in your school or church, chances are likely that you could have a girlfriend. You must be willing to take the risk and ask them out. Many girls want to be pursued and want the guys to ask them out. You must also ask yourself if you are looking for a perfect looking girl, one that you feel will bring your status up. Instead of selecting one that you feel is a really nice girl.

I am a firm believer that people should date only when they are emotionally whole. Because 2 halves can only make one whole, and one person is left empty. As a believer, You are complete in Christ, and dating is not essential to wholeness. Group experiences are a great way to learn to relate to the opposite sex. Just remember that these girls are your sisters in Christ and should be treated that way.

In His Service,
Mama Jo

P.S

“Dating is an important, but a small part of a teenager's total life, just as the icing is an important, but a small part of the cake. Dating too often (or for too many hours) is like a cake that is all icing. Keep dating activities in balance; do not let dating interfere with your duties to God, to family, to school, or to self.” Click Here to read the full article